Message to the Class of 2023:
In a real sense, you have been Pioneers on this journey. As I have said before, you represent ½ of 1 percent of the American school-age population who have had the opportunity to attend a prep school such as Trinity-Pawling. You are in a distinct minority of students who have had this opportunity and this type of experience. And, it has not all been easy.
There have been days of triumph and days of defeat. Days of joy and days of sorrow. But, through it all, you have pressed ONWARD. You have pioneered your way ahead and you stand on the precipice of your new, adult life. Indeed, you will be pioneering your way into this new stage of your life.
Like Pioneers, you will be leaving what has become familiar to you and venturing out into a wilderness of new challenges and new opportunities.
Like Pioneers, you will need to pack for the journey. You can’t take everything from your current life for the journey ahead, but there is room for some things to pack with you before you depart. Here are some suggestions for your packing list — consider packing:
- You, at your best — we all have better days than others. We all have days when we are at our best and then there are days when we are not really at our best. Know what the difference is between the two days and pack you, on your best days.
- Consider packing effort — you have learned at Trinity-Pawling that effort leads to achievement. Never lose sight of this simple equation. On the journey ahead, you will run into many people who will achieve. Some will have been given the gifts to achieve without much effort. I would suggest that such people have not yet learned the critical nature of this simple equation. And, if they didn’t learn it when they were younger, they may never be able to learn it. You have learned this equation and you have mastered it. Now, you can apply it in the real world. But, just remember that this equation will no longer be equated with more free time, more weekend privileges, and special treats. The reality is that this equation of effort leading to achievement will now, more often than not, also mean that more effort will be rewarded with more work, more responsibilities, and greater accountability. Yet, it will also lead to greater satisfaction, stronger confidence, and the happiness of knowing that you did your best.
- Consider packing a joyful perspective — wherever the journey ahead takes you, there will be challenges, hardships, and setbacks. You have faced this reality here. Out there, however, this reality can have more of an impact on how you look at life, yourself, and others — if you let it. Take a joyful perspective with you because this will allow you to process challenges, hardships, and setbacks in a healthy way. This doesn’t mean that you have to try to find joy in challenges, hardships, and setbacks as such an approach can actually be unhealthy. Rather, it means that you have the choice each day to see aspects of joy in each day. You have had these moments here, many of them. You have shared these moments with one another. Make sure you stay in touch with one another, especially during times of challenges, hardships, and setbacks. There is joy in the relationships that you have forged with your brothers. Allow this joy to always be a part of your life and journey.
As much as you have been Pioneers and as much as you will be Pioneers for the coming journey away from Trinity-Pawling, you must always remember that every Pioneer eventually becomes a Settler.
So, at some point on the journey ahead you, too, will become a Settler. You will settle down and plant some roots. You will likely do this several times ahead. You may become a Pioneer again, choosing to leave a career in order to find the next chapter in your life. But, you will settle. You have learned how to do this here, too — how to settle.
On the journey ahead, while you are pioneering forward, be thinking about where and how you might like to settle. But, remember that the choice of settling well or settling poorly will be yours, just as it has been here.
The trick to settling in life is to know how to settle well. So, when you are packing your bag for your pioneering journey, I would suggest you pack a separate bag that is your settling bag.
Here are some items that you might want to consider adding to this bag — consider packing:
- Your integrity — often the difference between settling well in life and settling poorly in life is whether or not you have settled with your integrity. Character matters in life. Choose to take it with you on any journey and make sure it is in the bag you have with you when you settle. If it is not, then you will settle for anything. Slowly, choice by choice, you will lose yourself when you settle for anything. When you settle with integrity you will always be where you are.
- Consider packing your compass. When you settle, you will always want to check to see if you are still pointed in the right direction. Make certain you pack a compass for this purpose. Now, the compass can be anything in your life that will be able to check your direction to see if you are still heading where you want to go. This can be your family, it can be your close friends, and it can be times in your life when you can be quiet and still, so that you can reflect on who you are, who you want to become, and how you are going to get there. If you find yourself settled without a compass, then you may discover that you have grown so accustomed to the act of settling you will have forgotten why you settled there to begin with.
- Consider packing anything that reminds you of the you that you were before you started the journey. Keep your pictures of times spent in this place. Stay in touch with one another. Stay in touch with that part of you that will always be 18 or 19 years old. Often, when we settle in life, we can lose sight of that version of ourselves if we do not bring that part of us along when we settle.
You all are continuing on a journey that started before you arrived at Trinity-Pawling. It is a journey of self-discovery and self-awareness. It is a journey of figuring out your way in the world. It is a journey of determining your role in this world and the opportunities that exist for you to contribute positively and productively to it.
The fact of the matter of this journey is this. It is a journey of both pioneering and settling. Often this is happening at the same time. Whether or not you are packing bags for your pioneering journey or your settling journey, the important thing to remember is that you are on a journey and you get to decide what you take with you as you go. I hope that, in one way or another, in large ways and in small ways, your journey at Trinity-Pawling will always be a part of the longer journey on which you will shortly embark.
And, my last word before you embark on this journey is, of course: ONWARD!
by William W. Taylor
Watch Head of School Taylor’s full Commencement Address here.
Visit our Commencement 2023 website page to read about the Class of 2023 achievements.